Tips to Enjoy Your Holidays
Okay, here is my take on traditional holiday themes. In general, there are two things that create most of the stress around the holidays:
Dealing with family
Being a host
I often talk with people who are upset because other people are ruining their holidays. I tell them this is a misunderstanding. Holidays are not for our personal enjoyment; we are not entitled to the holiday we want. Personal enjoyment is for all the rest of the days of the year. You should make your life so good that every day is just the way you want it.
Holidays are messy affairs where we make space for people we wouldn’t include in our daily life. We surround ourselves with people with different opinions, perspectives, and behaviors. We make room for people we disagree with, we participate in things we wouldn’t usually do, we strive to become our least needy, most inclusive selves. Holidays are beautiful chaos! Let go of control, go for the ride, enjoy the show! You can get back to yourself next week.
Next, let’s talk about being a host. Most people think being a host is about making people happy. This is problematic because not everyone wants to be happy. People who want to be happy will be. People who don’t want to be happy, won’t be. So, we have to let that go.
Being a host means two things. It means offering and sharing things that you like with others and sharing your graciousness and goodwill. The game about hosting is not about how other people respond but how you show up. How you show up in regards to what kind of host you want to be.
My preference is to be a grounded, loving, generous, caring host who offers an environment, music, food, and gifts that I value and that mean something to me as a host. I imagine bringing people into a world where they can relax, where they can feel my relaxation and presence. I imagine creating an experience where they feel more than being served; they feel my ability to connect with them, and they feel an environment of safety and non-judgment. Why do I like doing this? Not necessarily because of the impact and result I get with others, but because I enjoy being in the role of and playing the part of Kyle as host. That’s where I get my holiday enjoyment. What kind of a host do you want to be?
Happy holidays from all of us at Life at Altitude. We cherish each one of you and what you add to our special community. We would love to be a part of each one of your holidays and experience your special flavor of what celebration means to you. Cheers to all the beauty, laughter, and love you cultivate, share and spread this time of year.
P.S. If all of Kyle’s amazing written wisdom isn’t enough to get you through the holidays and you need some personalized support, schedule a coaching call here.